There are many online dating services which emphasize a matching metric between users. For example, OKCupid has a system in which you can browse your matches and sort by the highest match percentage. After answering questions related to your lifestyle, how you feel about certain topics, what you would do in a situation, and other behavioral based questions, their algorithms find people who answered questions with the same answers as you.
Twolips takes a different approach. We ask you knowledge based questions that are agnostic to how you feel today versus tomorrow. If you’re really good at math, chances are that you will only get better at it as time goes on rather than completely dropping it.
Matching scores can be inaccurate
Relying entirely on this metric is probably a bad idea as there’s no way to guarantee that it’s accurate or even representative of how well you match with someone. It assumes that the matched individuals answered questions logically, seriously, and with accuracy. In addition, the answers to the questions may shift over time as someone adapts their viewpoint to the changing world. We’ve discussed previously how humans are great at adapting to new circumstances, and that holds true in behavioral tests as well.
Long term relationships (especially those that start early in someone’s life) are destined between people are will inevitably change their perspectives. While you may match someone based on your behaviors today, your inevitable shifts as you grow may cause a dissipation in your “match score.” Fortunately, if you really get along with someone, usually your growth and shifts occur parallel to your partner. Perhaps this can mitigation some of the match dissipation.
Too much overlap in interests can be boring
Imagine that you and your partner share all or most interests. You both like computers, non-fiction novels, pottery, and nothing else. Whoa, you’re a 100% match! The problem here is that there’s nothing unique that either of you brings to the table. Both of you are excellent at some neat skills, but when it comes to helping each other grow, there’s just not much there.
Sure, one of you may be better than the other at your mutual interests, but there’s nothing new to which you can introduce each other! We believe that this is a big part of why relationships grow stale. Without the ability to lift each other up above obstacles using your unique skills, how can a relationship possibly remain interesting? The “spark” that started it all tends to fade without ever being renewed.
Having unique skills can strengthen the relationship
It is often said that diversity leads to strength. Where one person may be stuck in the mud, another may find a new solution for a way out. With a diverse mindset and skill set, everyone on a team can move forward to accomplish like-minded goals. We believe that this axiom holds true in relationships as well.
Not only do these diverse characteristics help to keep a relationship fresh and interesting, but some serious improvements, strengths, and bonds can be formed as a result of introducing each other to your uniqueness. Let’s say you like to travel and your partner likes study other cultures. Those are unique, yet complimentary characteristics that can help each other out. You’re good at scheduling, organizing, and arranging the travel to an awesome location. Your partner takes care to understand the local culture, how to behave, correct things to say, and maybe some good foods to eat. Together, you can have a unique experience that otherwise may not have been possible or at least severely reduced with only a single skill set between the two of you.